Chapter 313 - 277
Chapter 313: Chapter 277
Uncomfortable?
Gu Ning touched her stomach and said, "If I get enough rest, I won’t be."
Barto watched her intently. "I’m not talking about that."
He covered the hand she had on her stomach with his own. His palm was twice the size of hers and easily enveloped it. He then guided her hand down a few inches, stopping when the edge of his palm brushed the top of her thigh.
Gu Ning lowered her head, watching his action. The warmth from the fox’s palm seemed to travel through her own hand to her lower abdomen, crossing an intimate boundary and guiding her thoughts in a specific direction.
Gu Ning slowly raised her head to meet Barto’s gaze.
An awkward intimacy began to blossom between the human and the fox, two beings who were otherwise so familiar with each other.
"Do you understand?" Barto asked softly, his amber eyes reflecting her bashful expression.
Gu Ning understood.
’She just couldn’t bring herself to discuss such a private matter with a member of the opposite sex. Barto was a fox, yes, but he was a *male* fox. And the one before her now was a male fox who had taken human form.’
’In the past, she had always felt that she and the Beastmen were two completely different species. Their appearance, their ways of thinking, their philosophies—it was all foreign to her.’
’Even with Cook, whom she had spent the most time with, she felt the species barrier was too great. She couldn’t treat him with the feelings one would have for the opposite sex and consciously avoided letting her emotions drift in that direction.’
’It felt wrong.’
’Because Cook was like a puppy, he lacked a human sense of self. She could feel that his protectiveness came from ’love,’ but it was a love that had long transcended romantic affection between a man and a woman.’
’If she were to cross that line with Cook, his love for her would have to be a *human* one.’
’To choose Cook simply to deal with her estrus, as Barto had suggested, was something she could never do. Even they themselves would know it was wrong.’
’Because for a Mixed Breed who had degenerated to Cook’s level, it wasn’t just about not having an estrus period. More importantly, they no longer possessed human-like self-awareness. Most of the time, their actions were driven by various primal urges.’
’The desire for food, the desire to fight, and the desire to mate.’
’Mixed Breeds indeed don’t have an estrus period, but they still possess this instinct; they have only lost the ability to reproduce.’
’These desires are the most primal, bestial instincts. Humanity is about self-control.’
’Beastmen have desires far stronger than those of Mixed Breeds, but they possess the humanity to control them.’
’Females are rare, so they use Inhibitors to suppress their physical urges and release that energy through combat. This is why most Beastmen are so hot-tempered and love to fight. If they get into a conflict, they never hold back—they’ll curse you out or start a brawl without a second thought.’
’Gu Ning had already seen the worst side of Beastmen in Zone 19, so deep down, she was terrified of their tendency to fly into a rage at any moment.’
’After all, a human can’t just get angry and smash a wall with one punch, or fight a bear single-handedly and come out unscathed, let alone transform into a giant beast.’
’And yet, she was also lucky. The first one she met was Cook.’
’In the beginning, Cook didn’t have the towering, muscular physique of a typical Beastman. If not for his beast ears and tail, he would have seemed just like one of the handsome, sunny, and slender boys she used to see sweating it out on the basketball court back in college.’
’Cook took care of her, protected her, taught her about this world, and even teased her to make her happy.’
’She was moved by his sincerity and innocence.’
’He lit candles for her in the darkness to drive away her fear. In a situation like that, it was easy for her to fall for him.’
’But just as her feelings for him began to blossom, Cook was injured and degenerated.’
’Seeing the boy’s behavior regress to that of a puppy, and with the added burden of having to worry about putting food on the table and keeping them safe, that tiny sprout of affection was unceremoniously snipped off.’
’Food and shelter came before desire.’
’Even when Cook was constantly nuzzling and licking her, she only saw him as a puppy who was trying to protect her.’
’What she cared about wasn’t Cook’s appearance, but his consciousness—his soul.’
’Cook had to understand what he was doing, not just act on impulse and desire.’
’He didn’t understand, but she did.’
’The fact that Cook didn’t have an estrus period was a good thing for her.’
’She could promise that as long as she had a bite to eat, she would never let Cook starve. She would absolutely take care of him for his entire life. But she couldn’t guarantee—she couldn’t be certain—that Cook would always remain an obedient puppy.’
’She had seen enraged Mixed Breeds, and she had seen Cook in a frenzy as well.’
’Barto’s earlier warnings and worries were not without reason. She had taken them all to heart. While doing her best to soothe and care for Cook, she was also trying to figure out a plan for his future.’
’Besides saving up enough to provide a safety net for herself and Cook and giving him the best Inhibitors, she also needed a group that could accept him and control him if he went into a frenzy.’
’That was why she had chosen Alex.’
’He was the most gentle and self-controlled Beastman she had ever met, kindhearted but still possessing a sharp edge.’
’And precisely because he was her choice, she had been so panicked that night when she thought Alex mistook her for a Mimic Mixed Species.’
’She was shouldering the fear of survival for two people.’
’She was just an ordinary human, doing everything in her power to survive. She didn’t dare to gamble.’
’She knew very well that if something happened to her, Cook probably wouldn’t survive either.’
’After that night, the fragile sense of security floating in her heart was shattered. Her identity, the laws of the Beastmen, the Mutant Species... a series of events had forced her to face a crueler, more real side of this world.’
’Although Alex later cleared things up with her, she understood that she had basically just gotten lucky.’
’Lucky that Alex wasn’t that kind of person.’
’That kind of luck was no different from a gamble. This time, she had simply won.’
’Her misunderstanding of Alex also made her gradually realize something. She had to experience and understand this world and its rules for herself. The process would be difficult, and she might even encounter dangers beyond her control. But that was still better than doing nothing, waiting in fear and trepidation for an unknown future.’
And now, she was touching upon another side of the Beastmen, one she now had to face.
Their feelings toward females.
For Gu Ning, this was a complex problem, no easier than the desperate struggle for survival she had endured before.
First of all, she had never been in a proper relationship. And from what she could tell, Beastmen probably weren’t capable of having proper relationships either.
The words she heard most often from them were "estrus" and "mating," as if they were describing animals.
Perhaps her understanding was limited by communication barriers, but given how exceedingly rare females were in this world, the "normal relationship" she yearned for was likely just a fantasy.
Before, because she didn’t feel like a creature of this world, she had always seen herself and the Beastmen as two different species, and she had her own plans and arrangements in mind.
Now that she had accepted Alex, she had to face this issue head-on.
The constant running around and work these past few days had left her no time to dwell on these things.
But this misunderstanding with Vine had forced all the things she hadn’t thought about—and hadn’t wanted to think about—out into the open.
"You’ve already chosen someone, haven’t you?"
Seeing Gu Ning’s prolonged silence, Barto finally asked.