Chapter 197: You Can’t Even Protect a Rabbit Head, How Can You Protect Me?
Chapter 197: Chapter 197: You Can’t Even Protect a Rabbit Head, How Can You Protect Me?
"WHIMPER WHIMPER WHIMPER."
The crowd of demon beasts surrounded Lu Wu, putting on a spectacular show of sobbing and sniffling.
Only then did Lu Wu realize that her customers, regardless of race, were all crybabies and drama queens.
But Lu Wu had already tempered her Dao heart. Even when faced with a pile of fluff... Suddenly, a furry tail slipped from her grasp.
The texture, the softness.
’Alright, I can’t say no to this.’
"Fine, just hide a bit farther away."
Lu Wu had no choice but to give in, signaling for the demon beasts to hide in the forest behind her so they wouldn’t have to get too close to the cultivators.
But not all demon beasts were afraid of humans. In the end, a group of fluffy creatures stood by Lu Wu’s side, their eyes glaring menacingly at the newly arrived disciples of the Divine Spear Sect.
The beasts’ gazes were utterly ferocious. They used their eyes to warn the Sharpshooters not to touch their Lu Tuantuan.
Boss Lu’s security detail gained some new beastly members.
"Boss Lu, hello."
The elder cheerfully greeted Lu Wu after sweeping his gaze over the demon beasts’ postures.
He had overheard Lu Wu’s conversation with the demon beasts.
’As expected of an outstanding person. Even her name is outstanding.’
"Hello. Want to buy some rabbit heads?"
Lu Wu had no idea he was flattering her in his head. She just rubbed her hands together, looking at the group with anticipation.
’I thought I wouldn’t see another human for the rest of this mission’s duration. Who knew cultivators would show up so quickly?’
Faced with Lu Wu’s question, in the past, the elder would have definitely said something about prioritizing important matters.
But now, his body and soul were screaming.
’I want to eat!’
"Yes, I’ll have two rabbit heads."
The elder stood with his hands behind his back, projecting the image of a grandmaster. He expected Lu Wu to ask about his origins, at which point he would announce his identity as an elder of the Divine Spear Sect and wait for her gasp of amazement.
But Lu Wu?
She grabbed her spatula and some oil paper, wrapping up two rabbit heads in a flash.
"That’ll be twenty low-grade spirit stones in total. Thank you for your patronage."
Lu Wu put on a standard service industry smile and waited for him to pay, a hint of wariness in her eyes.
’For an organized group of people to appear in such a deserted place... they might be some kind of outlaws, like tomb raiders.’
’Don’t they say there are usually great tombs deep in mountains like these?’
’And this is the Green Origin Realm. Maybe there’s an Immortal Tomb somewhere around here.’
’Following the usual plot development, some villains would get inside information and try to monopolize the Immortal Tomb, not realizing the news has already leaked, drawing in countless outsiders.’
’In the end, a great battle would break out, and the protagonist would make a grand entrance to reap the rewards without lifting a finger.’
Just as Lu Wu finished mapping out the subsequent plot, she saw the elder give her an indescribable look before taking out the Spirit Stones.
The elder’s feelings were complicated.
’How did I, a dignified elder of the Divine Spear Sect, become a common thief in this little girl’s eyes?’
The way she looked at him as if he were a criminal made his heart ache.
’The matter of taking her as a disciple must wait for the right moment. Only after I’ve displayed my Divine Power will the little girl be convinced.’
With this in mind, the elder absentmindedly took a bite of the rabbit head in his hand.
"HISSS!"
Caught off guard, the elder couldn’t maintain his composure and cried out as the capsaicin went into berserk mode in his mouth.
His senses were instantly and completely overwhelmed. With his taste buds operating at full power, the elder felt dizzy from the rush of spicy fragrance before he could even exhale.
’It’s spicy, it hurts, but... it smells so good!’
His lips were burning, but his hand moved uncontrollably, bringing the rabbit head to his mouth again.
The moment the soft, tender rabbit meat entered his mouth, the rich, savory aroma exploded.
The deliciousness surpassed anything the elder had ever known. To savor every last bit of the rabbit head, he broke open the bones, his tongue sweeping every nook and cranny of the skull clean.
The marinade had soaked through completely. Both the softness of the rabbit meat and the tenderness of the brain brought the elder supreme enjoyment.
CRUNCH! CRUNCH!
Red oil splattered from the elder’s rough movements, landing on his white robes.
His previously spotless white clothes were now stained, but the elder couldn’t care less.
He let out a SLURP, his mouth wide from the spice. Dense beads of sweat formed on his forehead. Wiping them away with a sleeve, the elder continued his struggle.
At first, he had tried to maintain his image, eating the rabbit head in a relatively civilized manner. By the end, he wished he could suck even the cracks in the bones clean.
This method of eating, leaving not a single scrap of meat behind, was quite a surreal sight.
The disciples waiting behind him all stared at the elder with newfound expressions, as if to say, ’I never knew you were this kind of elder.’
However, once these disciples tasted the rabbit heads for themselves, they came to understand a certain truth.
Your elder will always be your elder.
By the stall, the disciples went from standing reservedly and taking small bites to hiking up their sleeves, squatting on the ground, and digging in with their heads down.
They ate with a single-minded focus that was a sight to behold.
Lu Wu even spotted a young couple among the disciples. At first, they were feeding each other bite for bite, all lovey-dovey.
But later on, the man started getting annoyed that the woman was eating too slowly. He turned his back to her, stuck his rear out, and ignored her completely.
Not only that, but he also took the rabbit head that was supposed to be hers, wrapped it in oil paper, and stuffed it inside his robes, clutching it to his chest.
Clearly, the man intended to hog it all for himself.
The woman grew anxious and sent him face-first into the dirt with a flying kick.
Then, she pounced like a hungry tiger, straddled the man, and engaged him in close-quarters combat with her greasy palms.
"Stop fighting! Don’t hit me anymore!"
The man covered his head and cried out, but the woman was relentless. Eventually, the man lost his temper too and started fighting back.
The brawl began.
To Lu Wu’s surprise, the woman was the one who ultimately emerged victorious.
’Well, her cultivation is higher than his. It was a simple case of suppression by brute force.’
The surrounding disciples didn’t try to stop them. Instead, they watched intently, treating the fight as dinner entertainment.
Although the brawl didn’t damage the man’s cultivation foundation, his once-handsome face was now a painter’s palette of bruises and red oil.
It was a magnificent sight.
Lu Wu glanced at her own Golden Core Early Stage cultivation, then at the group of disciples who were mostly at the Foundation Establishment Stage. She suddenly realized she was quite the figure herself.
’Sure enough, personal strength is what truly matters.’
’Otherwise, you can’t even protect a single rabbit head in the end.’
"Boss Lu..."
The male cultivator timidly walked over to Lu Wu, raising a swollen face to look at her.
Unfortunately, he was sporting a pair of very fashionable panda eyes, and Lu Wu found it difficult to discern his thoughts from behind those puffy eyelids.
But she knew the heart of a foodie.
"The rabbit heads are all sold out."
She pointed to the large pot, where only a little bit of marinade remained.
Afraid he wouldn’t believe her, Lu Wu even used her spatula to scrape around inside, ensuring there were no rabbit heads left.
"How could this be?"
The male cultivator cried.
Tears of humiliation streamed from his eyes, tracing paths down his swollen cheeks. They mixed with the blood at the corner of his mouth, turning a faint red before, SPLAT, they fell onto the stall.
This true combo of blood and tears was too much for Lu Wu to watch.
’Bro, you have it rough.’
’But I’m really all out.’
"WAAAH!"
Having lost his girl and his rabbit head, the male cultivator completely broke down.
Amid his heaven-shaking sobs, various calls echoed from the forest—the jeers of the drama-watching demon beasts.