Chapter 155: Penguin Brothers-in-Law
Chapter 155: Chapter 155: Penguin Brothers-in-Law
Gu Zhao hadn’t even had a chance to run before Gu Xulin snatched her by the collar. She was like a kitten, held fast by the scruff of her neck.
"No! Brother! You have to at least let me save some face when we’re out in public!" Gu Zhao struggled with all her might.
Gu Xulin gave Gu Zhao a smile that didn’t reach his eyes. "Face? Thanks to you, I lost any face I had in public a long time ago."
"I’m known far and wide as ’Monkey’s Big Brother’!"
Gu Zhao blinked, her face a mask of innocence. "I’m the monkey?"
Gu Xulin smiled.
Then he swung his arm, and his palm landed squarely on Gu Zhao’s bottom.
"OW! He’s killing the monkey!"
Gu Zhao howled.
The penguins hesitated for two seconds, debating whether to save their chick, but a single glare from Gu Xulin froze them in place.
"Little Cub~ We’ll go do your bidding right now!"
The penguins hoisted up the bound Ye Kui and scurried toward their habitat.
Before they even arrived, Ye Kui had already started to vomit.
The penguin beneath her leaped in fright. "AHHHHHH! Stop puking!! I’m getting dirty! WAAAAH!"
"BLECH... Gu Zhao! BLECH... You... BLECH..." Ye Kui was in a terrible state.
Right now, she was incredibly thankful she wasn’t a test subject with a keen sense of smell.
When the penguins set her down, Ye Kui broke down all over again.
"NO!! It’s all crap down there!" Ye Kui didn’t dare struggle. If she struggled, she’d land right in it.
But in the end, she was placed right on the crap anyway.
[This is one smelly livestream. I think I can smell that acrid stench through my screen!!]
[Damn! Snow Crap Beauty! So chic.]
[How can Gu Zhao be so vicious! She’s doing this to Ye Kui without even confirming it was her? This is straight-up bullying!!]
[What do you mean, bullying? The penguins were just enthusiastically inviting Ye Kui to be a guest in their home! How is that bullying! If you can’t say anything smart, don’t say anything at all!]
[If the penguins knew you guys were slandering their home like this, the poor penguin babies would probably commit mass suicide by jumping into the sea! They can’t go on!]
’I should have just grabbed the blood and run! What the hell am I doing?!’
Ye Kui threw up again and again.
Ye Zexi’s face went pale. He silently backed away a few steps, terrified that Gu Zhao would remember him.
But though he tried to hide, someone was staring intently at him.
Song Yi was staring at him without blinking.
Ye Zexi noticed and tried to threaten Song Yi with a glare, warning him to mind his own business.
Instead, Song Yi just smiled, looking exceptionally innocent. "Big King!! Brother Ye says he wants to be with his little sister!"
"They’re just so close!"
Ye Zexi’s face instantly darkened with rage. "Bullshit! I said she’s not my sister!"
Ye Zexi knew they wouldn’t care whether he was Ye Kui’s brother or not. He looked at Gu Zhao. "Gu Zhao! You can’t touch me!"
"You owe me! If it weren’t for me back then, you would’ve been given away to someone else long ago!" Ye Zexi said in a panic.
Gu Xulin stopped spanking his ’child’ and turned a cold gaze on Ye Zexi.
"What did you just say?"
Gu Zhao looked at him, too. ’There’s nothing about this in the original owner’s memories.’
Ye Zexi realized what he’d just said and immediately clamped his mouth shut.
Gu Zhao smiled. ’I wasn’t planning on dealing with him just yet. Who knew he was in such a rush?’
Gu Zhao waved her hand.
A group of penguins squeezed forward.
"Toss him into your habitat, too!"
Ye Zexi bolted.
The penguins gave chase, and the clever ones had already begun to flank him.
[What a warm and hospitable flock of penguins, so fond of inviting people over for a little visit.]
[Gu Zhao is sick in the head! And her fans are a bunch of psychos!]
[Hey, person above me, if you already know, you should just keep it to yourself. We *are* psychos, so what are you gonna do now that you’ve said it? Want us to come over and take a group dump at your place?]
Before long, the air was filled with Ye Zexi’s miserable screams.
Song Yi felt a sense of satisfaction watching the penguins chase Ye Zexi around. He, Zhong Mingrui, and the others began skillfully helping set up the tents and arrange their things.
At the same time, a group of penguins pushed a penguin chick toward an idle Zhong Siqi, then ran off.
Zhong Siqi looked at the squawking little penguin at his feet, then at the group of large penguins running away.
Silence.
"Brother, why did they toss the little penguin to you and run away?" Zhong Mingrui tilted his head, his little mind full of questions.
Zhong Siqi sighed. "Maybe it’s because I look kind."
While packing things away, Song Yi chimed in, "I’ve studied this! The penguin parents take turns going to eat! Brother Zhong is the penguin dad! His penguin wives went to get food!"
As soon as Zhong Mingrui heard that, his tiny world collapsed.
His little face fell, and he burst out crying, "I don’t want so many penguin sisters-in-law! WAAAH!! There are too many of them! Boo-hoo, if they live with us there won’t be any food left! Boo-hoo, I’ll starve! Boo-hoo, can’t you just leave my brother here to marry into their family? WAAAH."
He was so heartbroken, he cried until he couldn’t stop hiccuping.
Zhong Siqi wore a complicated expression, his face alternating between pale and livid.
’With a little brother like this, what’s so hard about dying young?’
Jiang Yuchen’s jaw dropped. ’Is that how you’re supposed to understand it?’
"But... but those are male penguins, aren’t they?" Jiang Yuchen said, utterly shocked.
"Then what do I call them?! Penguin-in-laws? WAAAAH." Zhong Mingrui was even more devastated.
Zhong Siqi: "..."
’If I have sinned, can’t lightning just strike me dead!’
[Penguin-in-laws, LMAOOOOOOOO! Pass it on, Zhong Siqi is marrying into the penguin family! The major Zhong family fan clubs can start organizing the wedding! We can’t treat the penguin-in-laws poorly!]
[The Qi-guin Super-Topic has been created! Everyone come bless this new flock of love-guins!]
The joy was for everyone else; the breakdown was all Zhong Siqi’s.
The other special guests who had come along were initially still worried about Ye Kui. Some were even about to confront Gu Zhao and try to rescue her.
If it weren’t for a few penguins surrounding them and preventing them from leaving, they would have already made their move.
Now, hearing the remarks from Zhong Mingrui and Song Yi, they could only cast sympathetic glances at Zhong Siqi and Song Zhe.
Gu Jiao sighed. ’My brain is always too slow to keep up with these group roasts! So annoying.’
Zhong Siqi took a deep breath, restraining the urge to shove his brother back into their mother’s womb, and explained through gritted teeth, "Brother is not marrying penguins! And the penguins are not going to steal your food!"
"Stop using that little brain of yours! If you can’t use it, then just don’t! Stop using it so recklessly!"
By the end, his smile was so menacing he looked like he was about to eat a child.
Jiang Yifeng also took the opportunity to explain some penguin behaviors to everyone.
After listening, Zhong Mingrui pursed his lips. ’But what Song Yi said wasn’t wrong. Didn’t they give the baby penguin to his brother?’
’Oh well, whatever. His brother is just shy,’ he thought. ’I guess I’ll have to be understanding.’
Seeing this, Gu Xulin suddenly felt incredibly blessed. At least Gu Zhao wouldn’t randomly arrange a flock of penguin-in-laws for him.
He looked at Gu Zhao rubbing her bottom with a pitiful expression and started to feel guilty again.
’Did I hit her too hard...?’
Gu Zhao angrily rubbed her butt. ’I’ll get him back for this sooner or later!’
’When Gu Xulin gets old, I’ll spank him every single day!’
’His saggy old butt!’
While they were busy with their antics, Ye Zexi, who had been enthusiastically herded into the penguin habitat, was now pale and unsteady on his feet.
"Gu Zhao! I’ll talk! Just get them to stop chasing me!!"
"Back then, a group of men in white coats came to the house for you! I hid you! It was me! I gave them Ye Zuiyi instead!!"