My Youth Began With Him

“Ni Yang… only after you’ve experienced a pain that normal people never have will you acquire things that normal people never would… You’re now a great star, watched by all. It’s that woman’s loss for not acknowledging you… but you must believe that the gift God gave you might be late, but it won’t go missing… One day, you’ll obtain what you have always desired.”

“Sister Mian… I suddenly feel like there’s no point in anything in life… What is my purpose for existing? If I die… the earth will still spin, and the world wouldn’t change because I left… With the passing of time, the fans that mourn over me will eventually forget everything about me, like ashes flying away in the air… without any hints of evidence left, as if I was never here.”

Everything that came out of Ni Yang’s mouth had hints of despair…

Huo Mian had encountered patients struggling with depression before, and most of them didn’t have any hope for life.

Some even had suicidal tendencies and thoughts…

Ni Yang was no exception…

He lacked motherly love, and had always been like an insecure child.

He admired the happiness others had at every moment of everyday…

A mother’s peskiness…

A mother’s food and dishes…

A mother’s smiles…

Also a mother’s criticism…

Everything normal children had was an extravagant desire for him…

She truly felt bad for this child…

“If God wants you alive, then he must have other plans for you… Why don’t you calm down and wait around to see what sort of gifts he has for you.”

“Will that happen?” Ni Yang was a bit stunned and didn’t seem like he had faith in Huo Mian’s words.

“I never lie. Why don’t you be patient and see? Living can actually be more difficult than dying at times… but to me, you’re not inferior, and you’re not one to run away when faced with problems, so you shouldn’t think of death all the time, because death is too easy; being alive is much more difficult.”

“Huo Mian…”

“Do you remember Uzumaki Naruto from ‘Naruto’? Both of his parents died when he was born, and because he had the nine tailed fox inside his body, he was treated like a monster by the whole village, but he never gave up. Ever since he was young, he wanted to become the Hokage and protect his village to prove his value and existence. You’re the same… You’re now standing on a stage, under the watchful eyes of many and praised as an idol. It’s not just because of your attractive appearance, but rather because you are so determined. The fact that you never gave up on your dreams is inspirational, and you need to let your fans know that you will never give up because that’s how you got to where you are today; you have to be everyone else’s dawn of hope.”

“Me, dawn?”

Ni Yang confusingly asked Huo Mian…

“Of course… you’ve always been.” Huo Mian patted his shoulder.

“Yea… I still have all those fans with unlimited anticipation for me.”

“Did you think that they all liked you because of your superior appearance? Of course not, they’re all smart people. A comment on your Weibo moved me quite a lot.”

“Which one was it?” Ni Yang was a bit confused.

“Your fan said, liking someone begins with his looks, but they stay loyal because of his talents, and they fall for his character’. Clearly, not all of your fans are only into appearances. They’ve seen how much you changed over the years, and how hard you have worked. They saw all your effort in every film, and how you sang all your songs with all your heart. Everyone has witnessed your efforts, so why would you put yourself down completely, all because of one person?”

“Even I forgot about that…” Ni Yang spoke to himself.

“You’ve been thinking too lowly of yourself, and therefore walked into an endless loop.”

“Sister Mian… then what should I do now?”

Ni Yang slowly got up from the corner…

He looked like a lost child as he looked at Huo Mian in a daze…

It was as if he was trying to find a direction to proceed towards from her words…