My Master Disconnected Yet Again

Grain liberation is a big test to one’s perseverance, especially a fat person. The key was to resist the temptation! Not to mention the ordinary three meals per days, Chef also made desserts and pastries in the kitchen, especially with Shen Ying, the 24-hour-non-stop eating machine. Occasionally, this was added to the sound of Rabbit gnawing at internal cores. It could be said that temptation was everywhere in the back palace!

But somehow, Fatty managed to do it. After the talk of Grain liberation, he had never really been by the table. He gritted his teeth and forcefully ignored all temptation of delicious foods. When he was really too hungry, he asked Father Niu for a Grain Liberation Elixir to sustain himself.

Soon, two months had passed. Fatty’s face was already wan and sallow from hunger, and his footsteps were unstable. And then… he became one kilo heavier!

Lonemoon, “…”

Yi Qing: “…”

Shen Ying, “…”

Father Niu was going a little crazy. He felt such despair: there were indeed people in this world who grew fat by drinking water… no, breathing!

“Father Niu, it seems that Fatty’s physique is indeed different from ordinary people.” Yi Qing looked at a certain person who was meditating in hunger, and said, “I’ve checked his spirit vein, and realized that there wasn’t any remaining impurities in his body. It was a spirit body like ordinary cultivators.”

“No impurities!?” Lonemoon was stunned. “It’s not possible. He was mortal for more than twenty years. Even if he ate spirit rice, there can’t possibly be no impurities at all?” He didn’t have the body of an immortal, which could refine the impurities in it automatically.”

“None indeed!” Yi Qing nodded. “Perhaps this is the Five Elements spirit body?”

“So his heaviness is not from fat, but spiritual power?”

“You can put it that way!”

“…” What the hell! These disgusting cheats!

“Since that’s the case,” Lonemoon stepped forward directly, stopping by Fatty’s side. He smiled in a very friendly manner. “Fatty, from tomorrow onwards, I will teach you to cultivate!”

Fatty shook a bit for no reason at all. But he still replied properly, “Thank you very much, Master!”

“Who is your Master!” Lonemoon gave him a stare. “Call me by my name.”

“Then… Master Niu?”

“…”

Flips table!

(╯°Д°)╯(┻━┻

Go to hell with your ‘Master Niu!”

——————

Lonemoon reflected on his failed teaching experiences in the past. Thinking carefully, he realized that the troubles those disciples of the sect got into perhaps had something to do with his teaching method as well beside the work of Shen Ying the cheat. Besides, in his entire teaching career, Chef was the only sword cultivator whom he successfully taught. And it was actually temporary teaching after he lost his memory.

And he was a sword cultivator to begin with, and he was born with a sword body. Even with the loss of memory, his body still had some muscle memory left. Yet, Chef, as a brainless follower, not going in the wrong way in the end proved that there was no problem with his teaching method back then.

So right now with Fatty, repeating those methods exactly would be perfect.

Or so he thought.

Therefore, Lonemoon directly set ten sword arrays exactly like the ones from before. Then he stuffed a sword right into Fatty’s hand and kicked him into it. He let him start slowly from the first level. Both being little cheats- while he didn’t think Fatty would be able to create his own sword dharma and figure out sword intent like Chef- learning some basic sword methods at least shouldn’t be a problem.

Probably?

Yet, after a few days, Lonemoon finally fully realized how bad Fatty’s quality with swords is. No, it was out-of-the-world bad! Lonemoon thought that however poor his talents were, with the cultivation of Nascent Soul, passing through at least five levels of sword arrays shouldn’t prove a problem. Therefore, he purposefully made an exit at the fifth sword array before throwing the person inside, assured.

However, three weeks passed and there was no movement from the inside. Lonemoon thought at first that he broke into the upper-level sword arrays, and felt a little happy. But Chef mentioned inadvertently that he felt Fatty’s aura weakening inside the sword array and it would probably disappear in a few days.

Only then did he enter the sword array to look for him. He searched through all ten arrays, before he found Fatty in the easiest array who had fainted for days. On his body were many small wounds from weak sword qi.

That’s right, he fell down at the first level!

Lonemoon had an urge to kill him and destroy his corpse right then and there. How bad did one’s sword technique be to go down at the first level? It was the sword array which Qi Refinement disciples with slightly better cultivation could pass through. Yet he, a Nascent Soul cultivator, was beaten down here – how did he do that?

ლ(゚Д゚ლ)

Lonemoon felt a pain in his ass. He had seen many clever disciples, but this was the first time he saw one so stupid. Heavens, how he wanted to abandon this task and leave!

He had to increase the frequency of training. In addition to entering the sword arrays he spoon-fed Fatty techniques himself. Things like talent with swords could be gained with enough practice!

“Are you an idiot? Don’t you know to dodge? How many times have I taught you this one?”

“I’m sorry, Master!”

“Do you want to die or hand your opponent a gift? I’ve already told you that this is where you block. Can’t you block?”

“Yes… Master!”

“Crawl back here! What did you grow such a big body for? Continue practicing!”

“Yes Master, no problem Master!”

“Down at the first sword array again. Go run fifty rounds around the Demon Palace, you’re not allowed to use Spiritual Power!”

“… Okay, Master!”

So the whole back palace echoed with Father Niu’s fierce roars every day. Even Rabbit who came to get his daily demon cores got so scared that he turned into his true form. And then… with enough scares he got used to it.

-_-|||

After shivering at the start, he learned to carefully watch on at the side, nibbling at demon cores.

Maybe because Fatty’s predicament served as a warning by example, Rabbit started cultivating even harder. In just a few months, he was already an eight-grade rabbit demon. As a poor rabbit demon who also lived under the despotic power of Great Immortal Lonemoon, Rabbit felt pity for Fatty, and from time to time, smuggled him some carrots etc. in the dark of the night. After a few times, the two poor things developed some friendship.

Occasionally, Fatty could be seen crying, hugging a rabbit head.

“Brother Rabbit, I didn’t expect that cultivation is so miserable! I’m so pitiful!”

“Brother Fat, hang on there! We must be able to succeed one day. Wanna eat a carrot to calm down?”

“Brother Rabbit, you know me so well! Can I have one more?”

“Brother Fat, I’ll give you three!”

“You’re my best friend indeed, Brother Rabbit…”

“Brother Fat…”

Lonemoon who happen to pass by, “…”

“Hehe, you two are close! Go into the sword arrays to cultivate together tomorrow!”

Fatty, “…”

Rabbit, “…”

∑q|゚Д゚|p

It was like a thunderbolt out of a clear sky! A great tragedy in the world of cultivators!

Are you a demon?

“Master, why wasn’t Father Niu so strict when my data was reset last time?” asked onlooker Chef.

“Well… Maybe you went up the levels too fast that he didn’t have enough time to prepare for class.” replied onlooker fruit-nibbler.

“… Oh.”

“By the way, why doesn’t Father Niu teach Fatty something else?” Looking at Fatty howling in a heaven-shaking loud voice and seeming all too miserable, she couldn’t help but ask. “Besides sword cultivation and body cultivation, aren’t there still elixir cultivation like Floaty, and all-rounded cultivation like Boss Lan?” Father Niu didn’t look like he didn’t know those.

“Master,” Yi Qing gave Fatty a look before explaining, “it’s not that Father Niu doesn’t want to teach those, it’s because with Fatty’s current situation, it’s the most important to prioritize sword practice.”

“Why?”