If the Deep Sea Forgets You

Xia Qingyi did not sleep well when she lay on the bed, her consciousness constantly drifting in and out of sleep. Her head felt heavy, pressing deeply into the pillows as though it was stuck. She wanted to turn over but her body would not move an inch. In her drowsiness, she seemed to dream of a girl who looked extremely similar to her, but the girl’s expressions were different. She was smiling evilly, and kept looking at Xia Qingyi.

Xia Qingyi heard her open her mouth and say, “I am Xia Qingyi, who are you?”

That person’s voice seemed to permeate throughout the fog and fade into nothingness. This made Xia Qingyi feel an inexplicable fear in her heart.

She repeated again, “I am Xia Qingyi, who are you?”

Xia Qingyi did not dare to look at her eyes. Her dream-self was especially scared of this person in front of her; she wanted to open her mouth to speak, the words already at her mouth, but she suddenly could not say any more.

Who was she? She was not Xia Qingyi, the real Xia Qingyi was someone else.

And she was just someone without any memories.

As though she was transparent in this world, that she could disappear at any second, and nobody would remember her as they had no place for her in their hearts.

She was redundant.

Her dream-self was very scared, and she covered her ears and crouched down, but she felt that the girl’s voice was becoming louder and louder, piercing through the nothingness of the dream until it reached the inside of her heart, persistently asking her dream-self why she wanted to steal her identity away.

Xia Qingyi kept shaking her head desperately, but the girl spoke even louder until her voice was tearing Xia Qingyi apart from the inside, I didn’t! I didn’t! I am Xia Qingyi! I am Xia Qingyi!

That girl was still laughing, her appearance was exactly the same as Xia Qingyi. She glared at Xia Qingyi crouching in one corner, and stretched her hand out with her nails pointed and came after Xia Qingyi.

Xia Qingyi screamed and woke up.

This was the second time that Mo Han was awakened by Xia Qingyi’s crying.

The room was still completely dark, he squinted his eyes and looked at the clock. It was only around two in the morning.

The sound of intermittent crying emanated from Xia Qingyi’s neighboring room, and he stood up immediately. He knew that Xia Qingyi had had another nightmare again after hearing her crying.

When he reached her room, Mo Han did not switch on the light as he wanted to give Xia Qingyi time to readjust. The lights in the living room were switched on, and he left a gap by the door, using the faint light to walk to Xia Qingyi’s bedside. He bent down to gently pat at her face and called her name.

It was only then Mo Han discovered that her face was drenched such that he could not even tell her sweat from her tears.

“I… Xia Qingyi…” she seemed to be murmuring repeatedly in her dream.

Mo Han furrowed his eyebrows, feeling his heart ache a little, and he continued to pat her, shouting, “Wake up! Wake up! You’re dreaming!”

Xia Qingyi was finally shaken awake. After she struggled to open her tear-filled eyes and blurrily saw that the person beside her was Mo Han, the extreme fear that she felt from her dream finally lessened a little.

Mo Han was real, the person beside her was real and could be felt by her touch. He knew about her existence – no matter what, she existed.

Xia Qingyi started to gulp down breaths of air, as though she was a dehydrated fish that was impatient to feel the presence of water. Mo Han patted her back and said, “It’s just a dream, it’s fine.”

Xia Qingyi tugged forcefully at his shirt. “I am Xia Qingyi, right?”

“What nonsense are you talking about? Aren’t you always?” Mo Han steadied her emotions.

“Only I am… I am…” Xia Qingyi muttered to herself.

Mo Han realized that her breathing was rather uneven. “What is it?”

“I’m scared…” Xia Qingyi said in a low voice.

“What are you scared of?”

Xia Qingyi remained silent.

Mo Han asked again, “What nightmare did you have?”

Xia Qingyi raised her head and looked deep into his eyes, then she lowered her head and spoke without answering him, “I want to sleep together with you.”

Mo Han froze for a moment, and seeing that Xia Qingyi had leaned her body over to hug his waist, his heart leapt, and he reflexively wanted to move back, but was stubbornly hugged by Xia Qingyi.

“Why do you want to sleep together with me?” Mo Han felt her struggling to snuggle closer to him.