Everybody is Kung Fu Fighting, While I Started a Farm

Jiang He basically dug out his entire yard to harvest 150 potatoes.

But that did not add up, and he wondered if he should dig again when he returned.

After all, this stuff would explode if anyone stepped on it, and it would be hilarious if he blew himself up for his own negligence.

In the meantime, he had planted 50 out of the 150 potatoes, saving a hundred.

To ensure that the firepower was sufficient, Jiang He arranged them close to each other: he planted five rows with ten in each row, with a distance of 30 meters between each potato to put up a square formation stretching over 300 meters by 150 meters.

After he had finished planting his landmines, Jiang He put his sports car into his System Backpack so that it would not be caught in the blast. Then, he drew out a carrot and ate while he waited.

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And in the time that he finished one—

Boom!

The earth rumbled.

Jiang He’s ears pricked up and he exclaimed in surprise, “What’s that sound? It feels like thousands of people are running at the same time…”

He rose to his feet and looked out to the east.

Under the moonlight, he could see waves of human figures dashing wildly away on the tar road of the mountaintop farms. Their movements might be stiff, but they were exceedingly rapidly as they dashed alongside enormous Ferals.

The most eye-catching was one particularly massive pig.

Jiang He could feel its frightening presence even though it was seven hundred meters away.

“Eh?”

Jiang He suddenly gasped in surprise then. “A boar knight? Am I seeing things, or is there really someone sitting on top of the boar?”

He had to be seeing things.

Riding a boar?

While the revival of qi had prompted certain boars to evolve into powerful creatures, but riding one… how low would a person’s aesthetical values be to do that?

But even as that thought crossed his mind, Jiang He had already drawn out his Dragon-Slaying Saber.

***

In the distance.

Pain Star was seated cross-legged over the horned boar. Killer Star, who was following the creature, was still dripping blood from the gaping sword wound over his chest, his dead eyes glimmering with an unnerving milkiness.

At the same time, the Heavenly Generals Earthen Majesty, Earthen Diction, and Earthen Savage were staying tightly by their side.

Pain Star spoke then, asking, “Where are the remaining members of our group?”

“My lady, they are hiding in an unpopulated village right now, but would join the battle at Lingzhou City upon your command.”

Earthen Savage responded with reverence.

Pain Star, however, waved him off. “No need.”

“It’s Lingzhou City. There’s not even a rank-nine around—they would never stop me unless they deploy arsenals of high-grade thermal weapons.”

Her words were filled with confidence.

After all, her superpower was enough for her to stand alone against an army in such battles.

As for arsenals of high-grade thermal weapons?

With over several hundred thousand individuals populating Lingzhou City, as long as the Martial Arts Department (MAD) and military would not abandon their rationality and resort to citywide slaughter, they would never have the guts to use thermal weapons.

“Earthen Diction. You’re good at posture techniques, so take point and scout ahead.”

“Yes, my lady!”

The Earthen Diction Heavenly General darted away rapidly, and returned as quickly as he left, saying, “My lady, there is someone obstructing our path ahead.”

“Oh?”

Delight appeared over Pain Star’s face as bloodlust flashed in her eyes for an instant. Licking her devilishly purple lips, she exclaimed in excitement, “Are they MAD or military? How many are there?”

“Just one person.” Earthen Diction said quietly. “I couldn’t see clearly because he was quite far, but from the look of his figure, it seems to be Jiang He, the one who had slain dozens of our fellow believers, the Tranquil Heavenly General, the Earth Demon Heavenly General, and Killer Star.”

***

“What’s going on?”

Over the ridge of a cornfield, Jiang He was blinking even as he carried his Dragon-Slaying Saber.

A geezer seemed to have been running towards him.

He was quick, but it also seems that he turned and ran after he saw Jiang He from three hundred meters away.

“The codger isn’t a weakling. He moved so quickly that he has to be a rank-seven grandmaster, and probably stronger than the Earth Demon Heavenly General.” When Jiang He considered whether he should give chase and stab the old man a bit, the rumbling was suddenly slowing down.

The hordes of human figures were now distinct in Jiang He’s vision.

Since the distance was too far before for Jiang He to see clearly, now that there were just several hundred meters away, he could now make out a facial scar on one of the person’s face. It must have been a gash left by a Feral because half his face was missing, and one of his eyes was dangling out of its socket. At the same time, the blood on his face had yet to dry, and kept dripping out without end.

The person beside him was no better—he was dragging one of his own arms on the ground along with his body. It must have been mauled by a Feral, leaving half-chewed bones, tendons, and skin.

More bizarrely, there was a vague gray mist covering their bodies, and their eyes were a bizarre gray hue.

“What the hell. How frightening!”

Jiang He couldn’t help shuddering. It was a sight that made him remember the zombie movies he had watched in his last life, and those monsters were no different from the corpses here.

Even as those thoughts crossed his mind, those walking dead slowly made their way towards Jiang He, with quite a few Ferals amongst their ranks.

“So, the Ferals are zombies too… they must have been the missing bodies of the villagers, townsfolk, and Ferals.”

Rage brewed in Jiang He’s gaze at that very thought.

He had nothing against the Sky Demon Cult’s ambition to conquer the world, but those civilians were innocent.

Meanwhile, the zombies all stopped 200 meters away from Jiang He. With over a thousand of them gathered in a rather tight formation, Jiang He could not help being worried.

Could the potatoes he buried really blow they all up in a single blast?

“Well, it’s fine. I could just throw a few more pea bombs to follow up.”

Kekekeke!

That was when crisp laughter echoed from behind the zombies.

Boom!

Boom!

The earth shook as a horned boar that stood taller than a bus advanced from the rear.

Pain Star slowly rose to her feet atop the horned boar’s back then, laughing as she fiddled with her short hair. “You have some guts, in you, kiddo. But did you really think that my Holy Faith is helpless against you just because you wiped out some pieces of trash?”

Jiang He gaped.

What the hell.

Was that… really a boar knight?

And was that woman over thirty?

To think that an old cow was acting youthful, putting on smoky makeup—and thick makeup at that.

Jiang He could see that clearly under the moonlight, even though there was a distance of two hundred meters between them.

Really…

He could not bear to look!

“Guess I have myself to blame for eating too many carrots and getting such perfect eyesight.”

Even as he complained inwardly, Jiang He studied their group as well as the horde of zombies, inwardly praising his own maneuver.

“Forgive me for being direct,” he said earnestly, “but a bunch of uglies like you would never defeat me!”

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