Chapter 319 - Despair & Hope
Chapter 319: Despair & Hope
It rained in Darkness Port around the afternoon.
The drizzle was rare on the shore. It was fine and soft, continuous and somewhat lonely.
People who lived by the shore knew that even in the Purple Moon era, it was unusual for the shore to see such fine and continuous drizzle because the rain by the shore was always temporary.
Gazing at the drizzle through the window, deep affection overflowed from Tang Long’s eyes together with satisfaction and a tinge of inconceivable anxiety. He looked at Higan beside him.
She was quiet as if she had returned to being that icy cold girl with few words, yet her quiet side calmed him down.
Moreover, Higan was currently removing the tiny wooden splinters from last night’s injuries on his hands carefully. She then applied some medicine over the wounds and wrapped them up with a clean bandage gauze.
“Higan, are you really Higan?” Tang Long gazed at her, muttering inaudibly.
Higan was quiet and did not answer. After she was done treating his wounds, she sat there quietly.
Tang Long thought he would never see her again after last night. Because of that, he had vented his emotions out with some harsh words. He was actually waiting, waiting for his men to tell him in the morning that Higan was gone and that she had gone to Tang Ling’s side.
Therefore, Tang Long did not sleep for a whole night. He spent the tormented night staying up with red eyes. He had many thoughts about the future, and no matter how he looked at it, all he saw and felt was excruciating pain that seeped into his bones like he had to watch Tang Ling and Higan be close to each other from a distance. If he finally killed Tang Ling one day, Higan would become his enemy!
However, even if he were to be her enemy, it was better than watching Tang Ling having Higan by his side, was it not?
Tang Long admitted that he was an extremist who would rather drag everyone into the abyss and share his torment than be a saint because he had never been treated fairly. Why should he tolerate it? Why should he be merciful?
Last night, he thought he had surrendered himself to the embrace of the devil. He completely accepted the darkness within him, but this morning when the knocks rattled on his door, everything toppled over and unfolded like a dream.
Standing in front of his door was Higan with breakfast in her hands. Even though she had ordered the servants to make the breakfast, it was still a first for her to serve him.
Higan tried her best to smile. Even though it was not the pure and natural smile that she showed Tang Ling, she still did her best.
Tang Long wanted to be treated fairly.
The two of them sat opposite each other and ate their breakfast in silence. Higan stayed with Tang Long since then.
When he read, she stayed by the window and gazed at the drizzle. When he was busy, she sat beside him and read quietly.
There were a few times when Tang Long tried to initiate a conversation. Higan looked at him, waiting for his words, but he said nothing. He had a feeling that he was dreaming, and if he were to speak, it would shatter the beautiful dream.
Whenever he thought of the conversation he had with Higan last night, his heart throbbed in pain.
Higan had not lied to him. She cared about him, in fact.
In the afternoon, Tang Long had to go out. No matter what Higan’s decision was, he had to move on with his goal and go to Zero.
He would then go and ring the death knell at the Desperado Ring. It was a grudge between him and Tang Ling. He could not let people think that the person who won three matches yesterday was him even though the victory brought him glory and reputation.
He, Tang Long, needed no one to build his reputation for him.
When Higan spoke, Tang Long thought she was going to stop him. He thought she was going to persuade him.
In the end, it’s still about Tang Ling…
Tang Long furrowed his brows. He would never be persuaded or compromised, but to his surprise, Higan asked about his injuries on his hands rather than stopping him, “If you are going out, shouldn’t you treat the injuries on your hands first?”
Tang Long went blank for a moment. He wanted to wait for Higan to continue talking, but she did not as she looked at him in silence with a brazen gaze.
“Yeah, I need to get my hands patched up.” Tang Long’s heart instantly softened and he felt wrapped in warmth. He called his men over to tend to his wounds.
Higan had never been so concerned about something before, but no one blamed her or had the intention to blame her because she was someone who simply did not care.
It was as though the cold and isolated Higan, who was not capable of dealing with the most common affairs in the world, was the Higan that matched everyone’s impression.
This time though, she stepped away from her usual character. She tended to Tang Long’s wounds by herself.
Tang Long’s muttering did not get a reply from her, so he started to feel uneasy again, but when he saw the neatly wrapped bandages on his hand, he felt consoled. He asked in an attempt to test her feelings, “I’m going out. What about you?”
“I’m coming with you if that’s okay.” Higan was straightforward with her answer.
“I’m going to Zero’s place. You can’t go in.”
“Then, I’ll wait for you.”
“You aren’t going to…?”
A hint of sadness flashed in Tang Long’s eyes. He was worried that she would reasonably head over to Tang Ling’s place while waiting for him.
“I’m not going to Tang Ling’s place. Not today, not tomorrow, not ever…” Higan felt agony in her heart. If she felt like going to Tang Ling’s place, would he even still accept her like old times?
She understood a lot of things in the span of a single night. She was smart, and if she wanted to, she could understand anything. Therefore, she knew that Starstay City, or more accurately, the Stardust Council, was against Tang Ling. She even knew about the encounter between Tang Long and Tang Ling.
Even without Tang Long, if Tang Ling knew everything, would he be able to accept the fact? There were a plethora of reasons for her to never change her stand.
Even though…even though she was not and would never be interested in joining the fight for power, what would she do when the time came?
Higan thought of the figure and what the figure had said to her.
When the time came, she was still one of the Stardust Council members.
However, she still could not find herself fighting Tang Ling. The decisions she made that day were all because she wanted to save a little space for turning around in the future, to make herself free in the future and face Tang Ling like how she used to.
It was not about right and wrong. It was about her heart and what she wanted.
Now, I know the world is complicated. Emotions are related to so many things. I was naive to just follow my heart. Day after day, I lived just to exist for a day.
The thought rooted itself deep within Higan’s heart like her decision that she had made the night before which had buried itself deeply in her heart.
Higan would never reveal her problems, and Tang Long would never understand her. However, when he heard her answer, he was so touched and excited that he wanted to hold her hands.
To his chagrin, Higan instinctively dodged his hand. It could not be helped as it was only instinct.
Tang Long was not concerned anymore. The situation was good enough, at least to him. It was like a dream to him, so he dared not ask for more. He responded “Really?”
“Really,” Higan answered straightforwardly. She would not see Tang Ling for a long, long time from now on.
Unless when they met one day in the future and Tang Ling could put aside all the grudges and hatred, only then would the decision that she made today be voided.
However, could Tang Ling really put aside the grudges and hatred?
Higan was in despair to the point that she wanted to return to that dark and cold world! She thought that maybe one day when Tang Ling treated her like a stranger even when they met, she would then have the courage to face and overcome her fear and disappear from this world.
At least, she would not have to wait until the day when she had to fight Tang Ling.
There was still a thread of hope that she clung onto in her heart. The hope was like despair. It was like poison or the temptation of the devil, yet it was coated with hope, deceiving her. If she were to accept it, she would fall deeper to the extent that she would endure pain and willingly accept loneliness, withstand the tormented feeling of missing someone and wait for the thread of hope to descend upon her without any regret even though that thread of hope might not descend upon her at all.
Tang Long was happy as he felt loved. He wanted to hug Higan in his arms tightly, but he was afraid that his eagerness would ruin the shaky base that she had built up with her decision.
“Wait for me then. When I come back from Zero’s place, I…” Tang Long paused for a moment and said in an even, careful tone, “I’ll go to the Desperado Ring.”
“Okay.” Higan nodded.
“You…”
“I’ll be with you,”
Tang Long beamed like a carefree child. With the drizzle outside the window setting off his handsome looks, many girls would be enchanted by him. He was a perfect young man with a pure and sincere smile.
Tang Long is really good to me, but the things he wants…I don’t think I can give them to him…
…
“How’s your fusion and merging of the strength of eight bulls?” When Boss Huang was serious, he actually had a strong presence around him.
Tang Ling stood in front of the anvil and said seriously, “I’m halfway there though I know it’s a little slow.”
Slow? Slow, your a**! How long has it been? I know you’ve mastered the method of merging your strength, but do you have to improve so quickly? Do you have to demonstrate what a genius is like before me?!
Boss Huang cursed countless times in his heart while his face remained serious and strict. “Hmm, it’s a little slow. It can’t be helped. People might assume you are a genius from various aspects but don’t think you are not stupid,”
“Yes, Sir,” Tang Ling answered seriously. Hard work compensated for stupidity. If he was really this stupid, he would have to work harder to make up for it.
As Boss Huang walked to him, he put away the large hammer that Tang Ling had been using for the past few days and hung it back on the wall. He then browsed the wall for a while and selected a new hammer which size was similar to the previous one, but there were lines of silver threads on its black body. He placed it in front of Tang Ling.
“Grade S alloy hammer weighing 8 tons. From today onwards, you’ll smith using this hammer. Continue refining the blanks with the set of hammer techniques, but now, I’ll teach you a new visualization method to increase efficiency. It’s called the spirit visualization method. When you are using the three techniques, apply the spirit visualization method in your movements and it will increase your efficiency,” Boss Huang briefly explained.
“Boss, can the visualization method increase the fusion speed of my strength?”
“No. So, you do want to learn it or not?” Boss Huang answered straightforwardly.
“Of course! It might not increase the fusion speed of my strength, but increasing the efficiency of smithing also means increasing the efficiency of my strength fusion.” Tang Ling was not stupid.
“You are quite calculating, eh?” Boss Huang commented. He could barely say anything positive from his mouth. Tang Ling was just being smart. What did it have to do with being calculative?
However, Tang Ling always seemed to fall weak before Boss Huang’s powerful swindling technique. In the end, he felt a little dumber in front of the boss. He really thought about the comment and started to wonder if he really was a calculative person.