Chapter 1504 - 1502: Doubting Myself
Chapter 1504: Chapter 1502: Doubting Myself
Chapter 1502
But several days have passed.
Wave after wave of soldiers have been dispatched.
Hill after hill, official roads, small paths, and large roads have been searched, yet there is neither sight of the living nor the dead, not even the slightest bit of news has returned.
Such a big person, so many Hidden Guards, yet they stubbornly vanished into thin air.
Not only the soldiers, but even Zhao Junyao’s mindset is somewhat collapsing.
The number of refugees in the city is growing larger, with injuries and fatalities increasing.
Famine, disease, riots, brawls, all the troubles that follow such disasters remain unabated.
Plus, there are those with ulterior motives secretly causing trouble.
The city’s population is filled with panic, each person living on edge.
Everyone is like a string stretched to its limit, unable to withstand the slightest bit of disturbance.
The further he thought, the tighter Zhao Junyao furrowed his brow.
The enemy is in the dark, I am in the light, the situation is extremely unfavorable.
Involving the countless people in the city.
He also has no better solution; apart from the distribution of relief grain and intensifying soldier patrols, he can do nothing.
As an emperor who controlled the world for decades, he is for the first time falling into such a passive predicament.
This feeling of being out of control, unable to direct the development of the situation, swept forward by circumstances, makes him extremely agitated.
The most deadly thing is that he can only let it be.
Enough, this feeling of being slaughtered is really enough.
If he ever uncovers the truth one day, he will surely make those troublemakers pay the price.
What if the old steed is laying in the stable? He still aspires to great distances.
Zhao Junyao is full of worries.
He clenched his fists tightly, his gaze cold, staring out the window, silent and worried, sitting through the entire night.
After sitting all night, he suddenly aged significantly.
His form became more hunched, with more white hairs at the temples, and even those frost-filled eyes acquiring more bloodshot and murkiness, losing some of their sharpness and authority.
The emperor who once galloped across the world has finally been altered by time.
...
This trip, he did not bring Li Shengan.
For one, he was already elderly, his old arms and legs unable to withstand the hardship of travel.
Secondly, he no longer needed to handle any affairs; bringing along two trusted eunuchs to manage chores was sufficient.
Thus, after entering the city, he essentially had no capable assistants by his side.
Fortunately, Li Deming was still here.
As Li Shengan’s godson, he almost inherited all the true teachings of his godfather, with very similar style and manner.
Clever but not lacking steadiness, smart but not to the extent of being too clever by half.
These two points greatly suited his taste, Zhao Junyao thus found it convenient to use him.
After all, whose confidant isn’t a confidant?
Li Deming knew that Taishang Huang was alone, and understood his godfather’s condition.
So he took the initiative to handle affairs by the side of Taishang Huang.
Welcoming and farewelling, delivering summons, all were borne by him alone.
...
The night before, Li Deming issued Taishang Huang’s last decree, namely, the decree to send five hundred men to rescue the Emperor.
Half an hour later, he returned to report.
Seeing Taishang Huang standing at the window, worried, full of melancholy.
He wanted to advise but dared not, kneeling without a word.
Zhao Junyao had no mood to say much.
Upon hearing his report, he waved his hand to dismiss him.
Li Deming dared not say more, bowing his head as he left.
Until the following morning, when he came to attend to Taishang Huang—he discovered.
Taishang Huang seemed to have sat at the window all night.
Late October in Guangnan is neither cold nor hot, but the humidity is heavy.
It was heard that Taishang Huang’s health has never been good, and a few days ago Aunt Zi Yue from the Empress Dowager’s side delivered medicine with repeated instructions.
Not to catch cold, nor heat, must take medicine on time, and summon the Imperial Physician regularly.
Otherwise...
His heart immediately leapt.
If Taishang Huang indeed meets some misfortune, he wouldn’t be able to escape blame even if he dies a hundred times.
Li Deming felt a chill on his back, rushing forward.
"Taishang Huang, did you... sit here all night?"
"Are you feeling unwell anywhere? Let me summon an Imperial Physician to examine you!"
He was very worried.
Yet Zhao Junyao waved his hand in discomfort.
"No need!"
He sighed and asked.
"Is there any news today? Anything important outside?"
These are two questions: the first about the Emperor’s news, the second about the people outside.
His voice hoarse, full of age, with the bloodiness in his eyes seeming heavier than usual, and the hair at his temples graying after one night.
Li Deming was deeply saddened.
It’s said that it is cold at great heights, but where is it just cold? It’s unbearable fate!
Taishang Huang, now in his fifties or sixties, after abdication should have led a leisurely and affluent life.
But now! At such an advanced age, he still has to toil and worry about the people.
The Emperor even more so, neither sight of the living nor the dead.
To say something ominous, should the Emperor really meet a tragic fate, wouldn’t Taishang Huang have to send a black-haired person, with his white hair??
Li Deming dared not think further, bowing his head in deep emotional turmoil.
Oh Emperor, oh Emperor, where on earth have you gone!
Gathering his many thoughts, Li Deming respectfully replied.
"To report to Taishang Huang, there’s no news, everything outside is fine!"
Having said this, he took out a stack of petitions from his sleeve to offer with both hands.
"These are petitions from the north, several lords from the Ministry of Revenue and the Imperial Medical Bureau requested me to present to Taishang Huang!"
Zhao Junyao paused, raising his hand to receive them.
Looking at the petition embossed with gold, both familiar and strange, his heart filled with emotions.
Having abdicated for years and let power slip away for years.
He never considered that one day, he’d again hold petitions which symbolize the bond between the Emperor and the Imperial Court Officials.
This was meant to be in Chenchen’s possession.
He was a good Emperor, sure to carefully read, review meticulously, and then return them to the Imperial Court Officials.
But now...
Cherchen’s fate is unknown, the Imperial Court Officials, unable, had no choice but to turn and submit the petitions to him, Taishang Huang, who has abdicated for years.
One could imagine how helpless they were.
And he himself, how could he not feel equally helpless?
Zhao Junyao waved his hand.
"If there’s nothing more, you may leave!"
Li Deming obliged, saluting as he left, leaving only himself inside.
Zhao Junyao placed the petitions on the desk, and with calloused hands, skillfully opened the petitions.
Reviewing, replying, reading, stamping.
He’s performed this process all his life, mastered to the fullest extent.
But never had any time felt as now, filled with helplessness and despair.
Yes, despair.
At certain moments, he even started to doubt everything about himself.
Before, including yesterday.
He had an extraordinarily strong sense of belonging and responsibility towards the entire empire.
He felt that since he possessed the realm, he must protect all the people, must strive diligently to allow the populace to lead a good life.
If an emperor, during his reign, fails to improve the lives of the people or make the country stronger, then that emperor is undoubtedly unqualified.